You will never find a bigger football fan than I am, equal maybe, but bigger never, and for that reason you would think that I would be waiting in breathless anticipation of this weekend’s matchup: The Super bowl… I am not.
Heralded as the greatest day in all of sports, the final game of the NFL season has grown to become a spectacle of epic proportion, and one that if you say you’re not going to be watching, or you don’t really care who wins, your sanity is called into question.
Sure it’s a game that determines the nation’s most popular sport’s champion; sure it serves as an excuse to gamble, drink, and eat to a degree of unequalled excess; sure it’s the last we will see of football until training camp begins in late summer, but this year I’m going to be staring at my eyelids.
Why you ask…. well mainly, to be honest I’m not sure that the super bowl is about people like me anymore.
Let me explain: 1. You can bet on almost everything from Beyonce's Cleavage, to Coaches Wearing Hats, to the Color of the Gatorade, but I don’t gamble!
2. It’s estimated that ESPN will air 120 hours of Super Bowl coverage…. WHAT?!
3. There will be 100 chefs and 1,000 servers at the New Orleans Superdome for this Sunday's Super Bowl, and as guy who loves to eat that’s awesome, but The most expensive food fans at the game will be able to order is a Gulf shrimp cocktail that will run you $30, and the CHEAPEST is an order of small nachos, which will cost EIGHT dollars… SMALL NACHO FOR EIGHT BUCKS ?! , NO WAY!
4. And since my beloved Philadelphia Eagles never had a playoff chance in hell… I have no reason to stay up past the national anthem.
This Sunday evening while the turf, sweat, chicken wings and expletives fly through the air… I’ll be sleeping. Joe Thomas will get me the details on Monday.